This time of year I get lots of folks thinking about how to control stress in this New Year. Part of this conversation always involves discussiding the myths and realities of what stress does to our bodies and our health, and what we can do to alleviate those effects. Here are the basics of that conversation:

What is Stress?

Stress is often defined as events, situations, emotions, and interactions which are perceived as negatively affecting your well being.

What are some common causes of stress?
Stress can be brought about by a traumatic accident, death, or emergency situation. Stress can also be a side effect of a serious illness or disease. Stress can also arise from positive things. There is also stress associated with daily life, the workplace, and family responsibilities.
What are some early signs of stress?
Stress can take on many different forms, and can contribute to symptoms of illness. Common symptoms include headache, sleep disorders, difficulty concentrating, short-temper, upset stomach, job dissatisfaction, low morale, depression, and anxiety.
How do our bodies respond to stress?

In response to stress, our bodies undergo a cascade of physiological events which help us cope with the stressful situation. Perception of a stress activates the sympathetic nervous system (SNS), a process known as the “fight or flight” response, which mobilizes energy to help us respond to the stress. For example, activation of the SNS diverts blood flow away form the stomach and digestion to the heart and lungs to prepare for a possible need to run away form a threat. Stress also increases release of cortisol from our adrenal glands, which further contributes to redirecting energy toward dealing with stress and away from other bodily functions. At the conclusion of the stress, all these reactions are reduced to normal levels, and the body quickly returns to its state or balance, or “homeostasis”. This is a normal pattern of stress responsivity and recovery, and when this happens, we remain healthy in our minds and bodies and, importantly, ready to respond to the inevitable stresses that will come our way.

When is stress a problem?

Well, note that a critical part of the “stress cycle” described above is the stressful situation ending, and the body recovering. When stress does not end, or when stresses come rapidly and for a long time, one after another, the body does not have time to recover, and the stress becomes chronic. Chronic stress prolongs activation of the SNS and the cortisol response. This extended activity of the physiological stress response that these systems has been shown to have serious detrimental effects on mental and physical health, and this is where stress management and coaching for stress reduction can be really helpful.

Research shows that stress can affect mental and physical health:

• Exams reduce immune cell function and ability to fend of a cold
• Caring for an ill spouse reduces function of our immune systems
• Stressful events are associated with increased incidence of colds and infections
• Chronic stress is associated with development of depression and anxiety
• Long-term stress contributes to heart disease and high blood pressure
• Stress can make it harder to get pregnant and have a healthy pregnancy; stress is associated with prematurity
• Psychological stress associated with increased cold susceptibility and duration

So what can we do to avoid stress effects on our health?

Of course, it’s impossible to completely eliminate stress from your life, but you can make decisions that control your stress level and help you control the effects of stress on your health. At the core of stress management are things like following a healthy diet, getting regular exercise, and making time for uninterrupted relaxation, even if it’s just a few minutes a day. Happily, research has shown that people, even those living busy and stressful lives, can avoid many of the negative effects of stress when they implement and stick to stress-management techniques. So, the good news is that with a little planning and some support, stress does not have to create problems for your health- you can anticipate stress, build in support, and take care of your mind and body, even in a stressful world!

It’s a New Year.  What will 2010 bring for you personally and professionally?  At this time of year, we tend to think of making big changes in our lives and “fixing” the things that were unsatisfying about the previous year (or years), and these tend changes frequently take the form of “resolutions”.  New Year’s Resolutions are often large, well-intentioned, sweeping statements for change, that are, frankly for most of us mere mortals, impossible to keep for a variety of reasons.  For example, “Lose Weight” and “Quit Smoking” are 2 common resolutions which, although admirable goals for anyone, are certainly easier said than done.  This is not news to any of us, of course, as reflected in a  recent survey that indicated that 33% of Americans expect to have given up on their resolutions within a month, and fully 75% anticipate their best-laid plans heading down the drain by March of the New Year.  Why does this happen, and given that it does, why do we continue, as intelligent people, to make New Year’s Resolutions over and over again?  Clearly, it’s because we are seeking to better ourselves, improve quality of life for ourselves and for those around us, and are motivated to improve and change for the better.  So what’s the trick here?  How can the cycle of Resolution Failure be broken? 

A resolution, according to the Mirriam-Webster dictionary is, among other things, “the act of analyzing a complex notion into simpler ones.”  This definition is terrifically empowering, and can change Resolution Failure into Resolution Realization when carefully considered and applied.  At the core of this definition is the fact that most things we want to change are hard to change and take many steps.  For example, I am one of those “lose weight” resolvers every year, and happily, the application of this definition has helped me change an upward trend to a downward one over the last couple of years.  The key change in my thinking came when I applied this definition to my goal of losing weight and becoming healthier by resolving, not to just “lose weight” but to implement small, do-able changes through the years that will be sustainable and eventually get me to my goal.  For example, last year, I started wearing a pedometer, which has helped me increase my daily activity quite a bit and supported ongoing modest weight loss.  Thus, the resolution was not “Lose Weight”, but “Wear my Pedometer” which is, frankly, way easier, and still supports the larger goal.  So what’s the take-home message here?  Well, don’t give up on positive change, but re-frame it so at the end of 2010, it’s an accomplishment, not a failure.  Set smaller, achievable goals that you can readily implement and stick to, and before you know it, you’ll be on the road to making your larger goal a reality.  The January issue of my free eZine will address this in more detail.  Happy 2009, and be good to yourself this year!!

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So you’ve decided to strike out and do something really different and really shake things up in your life.  Maybe you’re going to go back to school, or end a bad relationship, start a business of your own, or get serious about becoming more fit.  It feels good to make the decision, doesn’t it?  You feel empowered and motivated and proud.  You look forward to the benefits of these changes with anticipation.  You are ready to make the changes real. 

 But….

 “… maybe it would be better to just stay with things they way they are.  Things really aren’t that bad, and what if things don’t go the way I want them to?  You know, forget it.  I’ll just go back to doing what I was doing before.  I mean, what happens if I screw up?  If I fail I’ll never recover.”

 Ah, the lure of safety.  It’s scary to make changes, and it’s totally natural to have second thoughts.  It’s great to say “embrace the change and make it work for you”, but that’s easier said than done.  Change, whether for better or worse, is scary and produces lots of fear.  This may seem counterintuitive, that positive change is still fear-inducing, but we all know that it is.  Fear is the basic emotion of not knowing what to expect and dealing with uncertainty , which is what change is all about, either by choice or by force.  Change frequently triggers fear, and that fear can seriously stop your progress and keep you from realizing your dreams. 

 Here are some strategies for dealing with your fear of change and getting moving on your goals:

 1.Take Baby Steps

 Part of what is so scary about change is that when we look at it, it seems huge, amorphous, and overwhelming.  “How can I tackle such a huge thing!  I don’t know where to start!”.  A great example of this is the person who decides to make a career change and do something totally different, but unlike their “career” something they feel passionate about.  Even that passion gets thwarted by the “bigness” of the unknown of a new profession or vocation. 

 Breaking up the huge thing into smaller pieces is the way to deal with this and to get the fear out of the process.  For example, if I’ve left my job as a software engineer for a large company and want to start my own business, that is, on its face, a huge task.  If I break it down however, into steps, for example:

1.  Brainstorm ideas for focus of business
2. Research other businesses doing similar things and hone my idea
3. Write down the mission, vision, and values of my business
4. Develop a business plan
5. Examine the plan for places I need help
6. Ask for help and revise the plan
7. Develop timelines for aspects of the plan
8. Determine which aspect I need to accomplish first and begin to execute the steps on my timeline for that.
9. Etc…

You get the idea.  As you accomplish each step, cross it off the list and move on to the next one.  Breaking such a large change into smaller pieces is great, because it’s easy to look back from time to time and see, on paper, what you’ve done to reach your goals.

 2.  Squash Your Inner Critic

 Related to #1 above is finding ways to shut up the voice in your head that tells you that what you are doing is foolhardy, impractical, doomed to fail, and futile.  It’s the voice that says things like “What on earth are you thinking-  you don’t know anything about starting a business!  You’re SO going to regret this decision, and before you know it, you’ll be begging for your old, crappy job back again, so just give it up.”  This “negative self-talk” is really brutal, but you can stop it.  Basically, you need to tell your critic they are wrong.  Counter the negative thoughts with the facts that you are doing positive things.  Sometimes it’s helpful to write this down so when you are feeling fearful you can look at what you wrote that is affirming (when your critic is on your back, it may be hard to come up with the supportive affirmations in that moment, but if you’ve written them down, it’s easier). 

 3.  Figure out what you’re really afraid of and deal with it.

 When you have pangs of fear about a change, sit with that emotion and look at it.  What are you afraid of?  Is it really that you’ll fail, or is it that you just don’t quite know your way yet?  If it’s really fear of failure, ask yourself “What is the absolute worst thing that will happen?”  If you’re starting a business and you have a sound plan, about the worst thing that will happen is that the business will not succeed, you’ll have lost some money and time, and you’ll need to regroup.  What is not going to happen, if you’re being  thoughtful and deliberate, is that you’ll end up on the street and will be doomed to a life of misery.  Think through the possibilities, good, bad, and ugly, and the probabilities of each of them happening.  Even if the worst thing happened, you’d survive, and by thinking through it now, you can develop a plan, which helps make it less scary.  It really is true what they say about “Nothing ventured, noting gained”, so get some perspective on what the reality of “failing” may be to increase your chances of gaining.  Also, remember that “failure” teaches us.  Check out this blog post on that topic. 

 4.  Get help when you need it.

 Ask for help in the form of colleagues, web resources, business groups, counselors, friends, and professional coaches.  All these sources can help you create a support system for yourself that will help you celebrate your successes and find constructive ways through unexpected challenges.