Change is good. In crisis there is opportunity. Roll with the punches. The glass is half full. Every cloud has a silver lining. Sayings like these are *so* helpful when the wheels come off aren’t they? These days with the tanking economy, lost jobs, reduced income, shrinking 401(k)s and IRAs, not to mention global warming and pine beetles, it’s hard not to feel a bit dark sometimes. Of course, even people like me, whose job it is to be optimistic, skilled at change management, and open to the possibilities afforded by change, have little “freak out” moments- I had one the other day, and you know, it turned out to be a good thing.

I spend the bulk of my time at the University and in my coaching practice being positive, optimistic, and “looking on the bright side” to keep morale up and to keep the train moving along. It is a heartfelt and sincere view for me- anyone who has been in higher education (prone to massive budget cuts) or part of a volatile sector of the economy (i.e. the current mortgage/financial sector) is used to flux and change, and if you can’t keep your chin up during that stuff, you’re in real trouble. However, even for those of us who are pretty good at absorbing change, once in a while the perfect storm hits and we find ourselves, seemingly, standing on loose footing. I’m a big fan of a good cry, and I had one the other night. The cumulative effect of lots of stress at work, my spouse getting downsized, financial worries as we watch out kid’s college funds shrink, and not getting enough sleep through a combination of traveling and stress was a much-needed cry, which, as usual, was essentially like setting the “reset” button on my emotional state and renew my ability to see things more clearly.

Part of the stress of times like this is the feeling of uncertainty that comes with not knowing quite what will happen next. For those of us who really like to have a plan, it can be unsettling, and it can be easy to get sucked into negative thought patterns that make things seem much worse than they are. One of the reasons I love coaching is that the work I do with clients is work I do with myself at times like this; the other night, I took some time to coach myself out of my little freak-out. Just as I support my clients in looking on the bright side, stepping back and taking stock of what is real and what is merely fear generated by thinking of worst-case scenarios, and seeking what is possible, I did the same thing for myself. At the core of this conversation was the reminder that the only thing I can control in this or any other situation is me, so I have to do a couple of things: first, I have to take care of myself, even if this means a little cry now and then, and second, I have to make a difference where I can by keeping my perspective and making changes where I can. The other part of is remembering core values and coming back to those. For me, a core value is a belief that if I work hard and always do my best, then things will be fine, sooner or later, even if at the moment things are a bit scary.

Once the tears were gone and I regained my footing, my vision was clearer and I was again able to see the possibilities opened up by the current state of flux in my life. The holidays will be, thankfully, smaller this year, and focused more on helping others than getting “stuff”- a welcome change. My spouse has the chance to make a career change he’s been wanting to make but never did before, and it’s wonderful to see him excited about the possibilities. We are all more aware of how fortunate we are, even though things have changed a bit, and as we tighten our belts, we are spending more and more time together as a family, even just talking, which is increasingly important in my house as my kids enter the “preteen” stages. The glass is half-full again, and it only cost me a couple of Kleenexes.